So I'm driving down the street listening to the radio, and some wine expert is giving wine advice, and he announced that the most misunderstood, misused wine on earth is --
Champagne.
He said people save it for weddings and special occasions, and it's usually served with dessert, when in fact the best way to drink champagne is with any meal that you ordinarily would drink with --
Beer.
Yes, you read that right, beer. Spicy, greay food is the best food for champagne, because it cuts the grease and tames the spice.
Okay, from now on, I want champagne with my nachos. And my cheeseburgers. And my jambalaya, and oh yeah, my homemade chili.
I think I'm gonna like this year, 2003.
Happy new year!
MEMO : 12.29.02 : [A TIP OF THE FEDORA]
All good things must come to an end, and that goes double for splendid, wonderful, exhilerating things -- like a 10-game-beating-the-politically-incorrect-team-from-our-nation's-capitol streak.
But if we had to lose, at least it made a fitting exit for a truly great Texan (who happened to play for the wrong team for twenty years), Darrell Green.
Way to go, Darrell. Way to play, and way to live..
MEMO : 11.27.02 : [BY THE NUMBERS]
Today's SESAME STREET was brought to you by the numbers TWO, SIX and TEN.
TWO. Two is the number of games that the Cowboys have won in a row. Two. Only two. Do you see that? This is how far the mighty Cowboys have fallen. This is the first time all year the Cowboys have managed to win two games in a row. Two.
SIX. Six is the number of times the Cowboys and Redskins have played on Thanksgiving. Six times, the Cowboys have beat the Redskins. Even when the Cowboys really suc-- I mean, really stink. Six Thanksgiving games. Six wins. Six.
TEN. Ten is how many straight games the Redskins have lost to the Cowboys. Most of those games, the Redskins have had better teams. But still, they lost to the Cowboys. Ten. Can you count to ten, boys and girls? The Dallas Cowboys can. Ten.
Two. Six. Ten.
Sunny days!
MEMO : 11.16.02 : [L.A. MOMENTS]
STRANGERS ON ELEVATOR : "Oh, wow, you're going to be on The Price is Right, too?"
MEMO : 11.01.02 : [MEAN MEAN MEAN]
I was relaxing in the rosy glow.
16,743 yards. Emmitt did it -- he broke Walter Payton's rushing record.
How must it feel, I wondered aloud, to know that every time you carry the ball, every time you gain a yard or ten or twenty -- You Are Setting a New Record. Every step taken, every yard gained -- history being made.
How does it feel?
And so he says, "Unless, of course, he loses 18 yards Sunday and goes down with a career-ending injury, and stays forever and ever one yard behind Walter Payton."
Okay, so I won't breathe easy until Emmitt gains a bunch more yards, too many to lose. Staying healthy would be nice, too.
But as for that Cowboy-hater who said that to me?
Some people are just mean.
MEMO : 09.16.02 : [MONDAY MORNING QB-ING]
The Longhorns did such a lovely job of smacking down the Tarheels, I decided to make Saturday nights my can't-miss football nights. Oh thank heaven for the Texas Longhorns, for giving me something to cheer about!
Then yesterday those unpredictable Cowboys smacked down Tennessee.
Huh. Who'd a thunk it?
Well, I guess I'll be watching football on Saturday nights AND Sundays.
Oh, the sacrifice. [wink]
MEMO : 09.11.02 : [IN MEMORIUM]
Let light perpetual shine upon them.
MEMO : 09.08.02 : [MORNING AFTER]
Oh big whoop. We lost to Houston, like that means anything.
It's not as if we lost to the Redskins.
MEMO : 09.05.02 : [NOTES TO SELF]
1. In future, consider potential embarrassing typos before naming characters.
2. In present, check entire script and make sure "Trudy" is never, uhm, something else.
MEMO : 08.25.02 : [QUOTE FOR THE DAY]
"I love the great outdoors, especially that space between the curb and the limo."
--Martha Boswell of "The Boswell Sisters"
MEMO : 08.15.02 : [COUNTDOWN]
Ah, the smell of gridiron is in the air!
And in the spirit of the game, I will list my favorite Cowboy names from the current roster. Some are first names. Some are surnames. All are great names.
Flozell
Dexter
Ebenezer
Filipovic
Lucky
Mike Myers (okay, both names, but Mike Myers in a Cowboy uniform, the mind
boggles)
Dat
Solomon
Rambo
Peppi
Angel
(Okay, I made one of them up. Guess which one.)
COUNTDOWN --
24 days until Opening Day
MEMO : 07.25.02 : [QUOTE FOR THE DAY]
"I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And for the people who like country music, denigrate means 'put down ...'"
--Bob Newhart
MEMO : 07.19.02 : [THAT TIME AGAIN]
I'm already getting taunting emails from
Redskins fans, can training camp be far behind?
But really. Do I email other people and taunt them?
I don't.
[ note from webmaster : yes she does ]
Of course, I have an advantage.
When you are a Cowboys fan, you don't have to taunt the Redskins fans, you just wait for the games to speak for themselves.
See ya in Dallas on Thanksgiving, 'Skins.
MEMO : 06.25.02 : [HOLLYWOOD QUOTES FOR THE DAY]
"Nobody knows anything."
-- William Goldman
"Everybody knows everybody."
-- Pooks
MEMO : 06.24.02 : [SCOTT]
Happy birthday, sweetums!
(smooch!)
MEMO : 06.17.02 : [QUOTES OF THE DAY]
''A lot of people that don't know anything about soccer, like me, are all excited and pulling for you.''
-- U.S. Pres. George W. Bush
''We were thinking -- which president?''
-- U.S.
World Cup Soccer
Player Landon Donovan
''On paper, it looks to be no match. However, we don't play this game on paper."
-- US World
Cup Soccer
Coach Bruce Arena
MEMO : 06.10.02 : [ANOTHER WORLD CUP MOMENT]
u-s-a u-s-a --
Okay so they kissed their sister.
One win, one tie, they're still in the race.
Go team.
MEMO : 06.07.02 : [VAPORS]
Russell Crowe as Davey Crocket?
Where are my smelling salts?
Mercy!
MEMO : 06.05.02 : [U-S-A!!! U-S-A!!!]
Bad news: I forgot to drag my lazy self out of
bed to watch USA vs. Portugal this morning.
Good news: I awoke to the news that USA had stunned the world by winning.
USA!!! USA!!! USA!!!
This World Cup Moment brought to you by ... well, me. Who likes that other "football," too.
MEMO : 06.02.02 : [QUOTE OF THE DAY]
"What I'm saying to you this morning, my friends, even if it falls your lot to be a street sweeper, go on out and sweep streets like Michelangelo painted pictures; sweep streets like Handel and Beethoven composed music; sweep streets like Shakespeare wrote poetry; sweep streets so well that all the host of heaven and earth will have to pause and say, 'Here lived a great street sweeper who swept his job well.'"
--- Martin Luther King, Jr.
MEMO : 05.31.02 : [MILLIE]
She introduced me to a girl named George, a roadster, danger, and a tall blond guy named Ned Nickerson. And did I mention the danger? I would be afraid to turn off the lights and close my eyes, because of the terrors Millie (her friends called her Millie) concocted.
Between 2nd and 4th grade I read dozens of those books, then I moved on. I haven't read one since. But I do believe she is the reason why I loved to read, and kept reading, and eventually started telling and writing stories of my own.
Mildred Benson, dead at 96.
You might have known her as Carolyn Keene.
Mildred Benson, creator of Nancy Drew series, dies :
MEMO : 05.30.02 : [SUBJECT :YULETIDE GREETINGS]
I believe in Christmas. I love Christmas. I would decorate for Christmas 12 months out of the year if left to my own devices.
That is the ONLY reason that when I decided to dust the living room this morning, I found an advent wreath still set up on a small table in the corner (that yes, you can see from the front door every time you walk in the house, yet somehow I never noticed until I had to pick it up to dust under it, which might imply that I haven't dusted lately, but I am sure I've dusted since Christmas, positively and absolutely certain).
Oh hush.
MEMO : 05.18.02 : [SUBJECT : HAIR DRYERS]
I lost my hair dryer. I went without it for two weeks, sure it had to be here somewhere. I had two weeks of Bad Hair Days (lucky I've got hats) because I was so sure my hair dryer had to be in this house.
I bought a new hair dryer yesterday. And this time I was determined to Always Know Where It Is, so I put it in the drawer where I keep my hair dryer.
Uhm, which is where I found my old hair dryer. In the drawer where it was supposed to be.
MEMO : 05.08.02 :
I knew I wasn't going to get a dog that day.
I went to look at the puppies, the dogs, to just kind of ... look. And I did look. How hard-hearted and cold-blooded do I have to be, to walk through the shelter and pet doggies and get them out to walk, and just keep thinking, "Nah, sorry, not you."
And I was ready to leave, but this big blond guy, you know, the strong silent type, was simply laying on the concrete floor and staring. And I figured, he needs a walk.
So I took him outside. And instead of yanking my arm off in his joy to escape a cage, he stayed beside me. And when I sat down on the steps, he leaned against me tight, pressed his head into my lap, like he was afraid I was going to leave him.
How could I leave him?
And so I sat there and cried because I missed Jezebel, and he cried because he missed his family, and then we went home to where he is now mine and we are now his family.
Ya gotta love happy endings.
I named him Jake.
MEMO : 04.15.02 : [L.A. MOMENTS]
STRANGERS ON ELEVATOR :
"We're going straight to hell, do you want to go along?"
MEMO : 04.07.02 : [flying high]
Okay, so I'm a nervous flyer. Not a paralyzed-with-fear flyer, but a nervous one. So, since I'm gearing up for a flight tomorrow, I will share a few things I learned about post-9/11 flying when I flew last November.
1) National Guardsmen at LAX tend to be stocky and swagger a lot.
2) National Guardsmen (er, women) at DFW swagger, too, and wear makeup. (Hey, it's Dallas, and girls will be girls, okay?)
3) You don't have to appear dangerous to get "wanded," "patted," and have your carry-on searched. (Well, maybe I look more dangerous than I think.)
4) It's still safe to fly. (Which will be my mantra tomorrow.)
Safe journeys and smooth landings to all -- I will next check in from the City of Angels!
MEMO : 03.30.02 : [QUEEN MUM]
She loved gin, race horses, and last time I saw her, she was still wearing heels. She refused to leave England during WWII, and instead stayed with her children to rally Londoners during the Blitz. She visited bombed-out buildings in her furs and jewels, claiming that the people would wear their best to visit her, so she would do the same for them.
My word, she might as well have been a Texan.
We'll miss her.
MEMO : 03.27.02 : [SWEET BABY JAMES]
Happy birthday.
[smooch!]
MEMO : 03.26.02 : [EULOGIES]
I went to a funeral today. Two women got up to give the eulogy. They grinned and said, "We loved her so very, very much -- that we won't tell you everything we know."
I now know what promise to extract from my friends and kin.
(You know what not to tell.)
(And don't forget the Hallelujah Chorus.)
MEMO : 03.13.02 : [PACING]
She's been in labor over 24 hours, but they say that's not unusual when the baby is going to weigh around 250 pounds.
Poor Babe. I keep listening to the news, to see if the Fort Worth Zoo has announced that she's given birth yet.
Being an pregnant elephant must suck.
MEMO : 02.26.02 :
Thought for the day:
Money talks. Chocolate sings.
MEMO : 02.26.02 :
It is sneaky cold in Dallas today. You look out the window, the sun is shining, there's not a cloud in that Texas-blue sky and it's windy. It's "tie the dogs and small children down if you don't want them to go flying" windy.
You step out into it, and it's "slap your face, fling steak knives at your bare skin" cold and windy. Barely above freezing and blowing like hell.
I don't want to hear from you if you're in Alaska. I swear, Alaska just blew by my window.
MEMO : 02.15.02 :
Five injections in the nose, two minor surgeries, and a few stitches later, not to mention the subsequent black eye and swelling -- if I end up with a scar after all this and anybody asks me "What happened to your nose," I've decided the truth is too mundane for all the pain and suffering I've been through.
So, as of now, "I fell doing a triple-sowcow-double-axle-thingy."
And that's as close to the truth as you're gonna get.
MEMO : 02.04.02 :
Actually, I think the perfect place to write would be a Tex-Mex restaurant, in a booth, with a bottomless pitcher of margaritas, but then I suspect there's a flaw in that plan.
MEMO : 02.01.02 : [SUPER WHAT?]
Can there be a Super Bowl without the Cowboys?
I think not.
But there's gonna be a great halftime, and the commercials rock.
MEMO : 01.28.02 :
So I'm depressed today, and then I stand in a long line at the post office to mail something, and when I get to the window the clerk says, "Hey, Miss Hollywood, want a cookie?," and hands me a basket of warm, homemade cookies.
MEMO : 01.23.02 : [TO WEBMASTER]
P.S.: I know I'm insane. Maybe it will pass.
MEMO : 01.23.02 : [FROM WEBMASTER]
That is a good memo.
MEMO : 01.23.02 : [TO WEBMASTER]
Run with it. I'm too insane to stop you.
MEMO : 01.22.02 : [TO THOSE WHO KNOW SUCH THINGS]
Headache remedies needed. Tylenol doesn't work. Can't take ibuprofen or aspirin. Got any remedies? Legal ones?
Send them. Please.
P.S.: Check out the press area. There's an epic interview there.
MEMO : 01.14.02 : [TO SHE WHO SHOULD KNOW BETTER]
Damn it, Sam does too have the flu. It is not anthrax. It was not my mom's cookies. It's the flu.
Sheesh.
MEMO : 01.03.02 : [OOPS]
I wonder if the guy sitting in the car across the street is FBI.
I sent this package off to Portland, Oregon. Chili mix, salsa, my mom's famous (well, now, infamous) sand tarts. Cookies rolled in powdered sugar.
The mailman delivered the package wearing rubber gloves. It seems the cannister of cookies came open and powdered sugar kinda ... exploded. The package had been x-rayed and sterilized and they were pretty sure that the package wasn't anthrax ....
It gets worse. I was sending the package to a CATHEDRAL. Nice people. Nice people in dog collars who suddenly had a white powder coated box in their office, and a mailman with rubber gloves warning them that it's better to be safe than sorry.
Ooops.
MEMO : 01.01.02 : [HOW I SPENT NEW YEAR'S EVE]
I found the following under my desk : 1 pair serviceable Doc Martens, 1 pair sexy Anne Klein heels, 1 pair comfy Teva sandals, 1 pair black Chuck Martins, and assorted mismatched socks.
I found the following under my file cabinets : 3 pennies, 1 Canadian loonie, 2 English pounds, 1 nickel, 1 tuppence, and enough paper confetti "holes" to have a decent parade down the hall (which is why I usually try to buy pre-punched paper instead of punching my own).
I carried the following out to the trash can : 3 black plastic bags of stuff I needed to keep for some unknown reason but yesterday decided I'd rather see the floor of my office.
And at midnight, smooches and fireworks.
Happy 2002! May it be splendid!
:::2001::: | :::2002::: | :::2003:::|
:::top:::|